Learning to Understand Conflicting Beliefs

Welcome to 2021!

It’s a brand new year. One filled with promise of new things, new endeavors, and new and different beliefs.

Rather than address a couple of recent letters that were published in the BVD separately, I thought I would take this opportunity to address them both simultaneously within this week’s column and hopefully give myself and others a chance to grow and see things from other points of view.

Just before Christmas, there was a let-ter from Pastor Don Niemeir encouraging people not to be afraid to gather to celebrate Christmas. He pointed out some of the aspects the last time Christmas was cancelled and what that could mean for everyone moving forward, while sharing his opinions and beliefs about living based on faith. The following week, there was a letter to the editor responding to the pastor’s letter from Liz Cain criticizing his letter and offering her opinion and beliefs about not gathering and staying safe, based on her beliefs in science.

What struck me deeply about both letters was each individual’s strong belief that what they wrote, what they believe, is correct. If that’s the case, one would have to be wrong, while the other right, and vice-versa. But what if, instead of being right or wrong, they both could see things from a different side, a different perspective. What if, instead of reading to respond, we read to try to under-stand the point at which the other person, or in this case, writer is coming from.

Let me start by saying there are points in each of these letters that resonated with me. Not all points in both, but some in each.

First, I’m glad to hear that Pastor Don is doing well in his recovery from cancer. This is a blessing to hear.

From my experience with those who have had cancer, or have had it touch their friends or family members in some way, tend to look at the world and at life through a very differ-ent lens than those who have not. They’ve already faced a life-threatening disease and overcome it. Cancer is a son-of-a-gun, and it doesn’t discriminate. Those who have faced it have a different outlook on life, and that often includes not living in fear. It includes living life to the very fullest because each day they are here is a gift, and they understand that in a way those of us who have not faced cancer do not.

In his letter, he talked about faith, his re-ligious and his political beliefs. Those are his and he’s allowed to have them, voice them, and yes, write about them. Why? Because he - and we - are blessed enough to live in America, where we have the freedom to do, believe, say, and even write about those beliefs and how we feel about them. He believes in a God that will keep and protect people from a virus.

Liz’s letter contains her own beliefs. She believes in the science, what media reports about deaths, and the number of cases of a horrible virus. She believes in the science of social distancing, wearing a mask, a vac-cine and listening to whom she believes are experts telling people to stay apart for the holidays, and for now, indefinitely.

Both believe their words are the truth. From my middle standpoint, having read both of these letters, and in my quest to grow this year, I offer you what I believe from both.

I believe there is science about the virus, the vaccine and the seriousness of it all. I believe we, the American lay-people, will never know the real truth behind the science of it all because there will always be con-flicting science surrounding it. In terms of the vaccine alone, there is the science that says it’s good, has been tested, contains new technology that’s never been used before and that it’s safe. Then, there’s the other side of science that points out the risks, the side effects, the lack of proof it’s safety, and the genetic ramifications that have not been studied in full. Both are science. Which do you believe?

There are those who rely on their faith and religion, and trust wholeheartedly that their God or gods will protect them and those they love from the virus. I’m sure there are those who have passed that have believed the same thing. What someone who believes and trusts in their faith knows or feels is that they don’t have control; their higher power does. This makes them un-afraid of the things out of their control. Some people’s faith is stronger than others, meaning some people’s fears are more or less. Neither wrong, neither right, but it’s their choice to believe in their faith and reli-gion, no one else’s.

While I haven’t faced cancer directly, my mother is a breast cancer survivor and my father passed from lung and brain cancer. When my mom was diagnosed, she said things to me like each day is a gift and we could die at any time. When my dad was bat-tling his cancer, she reminded me not to fo-cus on the disease or possible death, but the gift of the time I had with him. Maybe this is one of the reasons that while I’m concerned about the virus and the effects it has on oth-ers, I probably lean a little more towards the not-living-in-fear side of belief. I’m of the opinion that when it is my time to pass from this world, it’s just that: my time. It could be a virus, an accident, disease, or any myriad circumstances. I don’t want to die, but I’m not afraid of death either, because it is all part of life. You don’t have to agree with me, but maybe this offers you a perspective on the reasons I believe the way I do.

Liz chooses to believe in the science. It’s her right, it’s her choice and no one has to agree with her for those to be true for her. Pastor Don chooses to believe in his faith and not living in fear. Again his right, his be-liefs, his choices that no one has to agree or disagree with; they are true for him. Whatev-er direction you lean, or whatever beliefs you have about the virus, social distancing, living in fear and more, they are yours, to share or keep to yourself. But as others share their thoughts, their beliefs, maybe try to really lis-ten, understand and grow in the knowledge that we are all entitled to what we believe, whether anyone agrees with us or not.